Father forgive them for they know not what they do. Hear my voice now Father. Give me a moment before you let anger consume You. Forgive them dear Lord. Remember You sent me here to save them and to intercede on their behalves. Hear me now precious Father. Please turn away Your wrath. They don't understand who I am Father. Forgive them. They just don't understand.
They whipped me for the liar who claims to tell the truth. He lies so much Father that even I want it to be true. He left work early just the other day, but when he signed his timesheet it was for 40 hours pay. He doesn't understand that the price for those 15 minutes was the very first nail that they placed in my hand. The pain was so excrutiating I thought I would pass out. Instead my ears began ringing from the sound of nail crushing the bones in my hand.
Forgive them dear Father. How was she to know that cussing out that driver would harm me? I still feel the force of those blows. But I'm not angry Father even as I hang. The lashes across my face are dripping blood into my eyes. But I still see her Father she is so angry without a real reason why. The woman that she cussed out had the right of way, but the angry driver used those words because she was having a bad day. Her first word was the short one that begins with s and ends with t. Oh how I feel the pain that that word caused me. The whip pierced my eyesocket momentarily blinding me. But the blood pooling from my face is not merely for her cuss words. They whipped me for everyone who cried Hosanna then crucify Him as if the first word was not heard.
Forgive them Father. It is the only thing to do. They do not understand that this act is about denying you. Father I ask you to consider all of them at once. The liar, the thief, the prostitute, the selfish who are consumed with their own wants. Father, please Forgive them. The pain it hurts me so, but I can't believe they would've hung me if in their hearts they'd known. I sat with you in heaven. I loved them before they were born. I was delighted when they sought you and in their sin I mourned. I didn't want to leave you. Father, you know my words are true. But the love we felt for these Your people was bigger than Me sitting beside You. Father how could they know truly how much they are loved? You sent Me, Your only Son, from heaven to hang here. They couldn't know. Inside my organs are failing, dying one by one. For the cheater my kidney...his mistress my liver... the addict will take both of my lungs... The pain is agonizing. It is a steady assault with no end. For Candy's attitude they stoned me, Natalie's gossip they kicked me, and Brenda's backbiting... Lord God when will it end? For the 8 kids that he fathered year after year with no wife... For the drugs that he sold or the IRS money he stole... Lord forgive them. Please just try.
The very flesh on my body aches for the fights that were caused,the commandments, the laws, and the silver coins that Judas had to take. The gambling, the cars, the lust you have for porn stars...just a moment with them is what I'm carrying today. The pain Father the pain. I'm trying Father. Help me to maintain. You sent me to die for their sins. I have to hold on until I've felt each and every one. I must hang here for the 3 year old who pushed his sister down. For the mother who took the fruit for her kids to eat cause their daddy was no longer around. For the one who denies me and attaches atheist to their name. For the Muslim, the Buddhist, the Christians are not the only ones for which I came. For Father you love them one and all. The murderer, baby mama, and the booty call.... The slut, the whore, the rapist, and the pedophile. Your love covers them all not just those who choose You. But Daddy the pain that is on me is unbearable. Lord God are You there? I can't take this anymore Father. I've had all I can bear. Forgive them precious, merciful Father. I'm pleading. I'm begging You. Daddy do you hear me? Daddy! Daddy! Where are You? I've taken on their sins Father what more must I bear? Transgressions, iniquities, healing... Father are You there? Have You forsaken me Father? Have You abandoned me? Please Father, please I'm gasping for air. Father please forgive them for they know not what they do. Daddy! Daddy! Daddy! (SIGH) I'm through.
Showing posts with label God. Show all posts
Showing posts with label God. Show all posts
Saturday, March 30, 2013
Friday, March 29, 2013
Father Forgive Them
Father forgive them for they know not what they do. Hear my voice now Father. Give me a moment before you let anger consume you. Forgive them dear Lord. Remember You sent me here to save them and to intercede on their behalves. Hear me now precious Father. Please turn away Your wrath. They don't understand who I am Father. Forgive them. They just don't understand.
They whipped me for the liar who claims to tell the truth. He lies so much Father that even I want it to be true. He left work early just the other day, but when he signed his timesheet it was for 40 hours pay. He doesn't understand that the price for those 15 minutes was the very first nail that they placed in my hand. The pain was so excrutiating I thought I would pass out. Instead my ears began ringing from the sound of nail crushing the bones in my hand.
Forgive them dear Father. How was she to know that cussing out that driver would harm me? I still feel the force of those blows. But I'm not angry Father even as I hang. The lashes across my face are dripping blood into my eyes. But I still see her Father she is so angry without a real reason why. The woman that she cussed out had the right of way, but the angry driver used those words because she was having a bad day. Her first word was the short one that begins with s and ends with t. Oh how I feel the pain that that word caused me. The whip pierced my eyesocket momentarily blinding me. But the blood pooling from my face is not merely for her cuss words. They whipped me for everyone who cried Hosanna then crucify Him as if the first word was not heard.
Forgive them Father. It is the only thing to do. They do not understand that this act is about denying you. Father I ask you to consider all of them at once. The liar, the thief, the prostitute, the selfish who are consumed with their own wants. Father, please Forgive them. The pain it hurts me so, but I can't believe they would've hung me if in their hearts they'd known. I sat with you in heaven. I loved them before they were born. I was delighted when they sought you and in their sin I mourned. I didn't want to leave you. Father, you know my words are true. But the love we felt for these Your people was bigger than Me sitting beside You. Father how could they know truly how much they are loved? You sent Me, Your only Son, from heaven to hang here. They couldn't know. Inside my organs are failing, dying one by one. For the cheater my kidney.... for the addict my lungs... The pain is agonizing. Oh heavenly Father the pain.... I can't hold on much longer. Father, can you hear me? Are you there? Have You left me all alone? Daddy! Daddy! Father....please welcome Me back home.
They whipped me for the liar who claims to tell the truth. He lies so much Father that even I want it to be true. He left work early just the other day, but when he signed his timesheet it was for 40 hours pay. He doesn't understand that the price for those 15 minutes was the very first nail that they placed in my hand. The pain was so excrutiating I thought I would pass out. Instead my ears began ringing from the sound of nail crushing the bones in my hand.
Forgive them dear Father. How was she to know that cussing out that driver would harm me? I still feel the force of those blows. But I'm not angry Father even as I hang. The lashes across my face are dripping blood into my eyes. But I still see her Father she is so angry without a real reason why. The woman that she cussed out had the right of way, but the angry driver used those words because she was having a bad day. Her first word was the short one that begins with s and ends with t. Oh how I feel the pain that that word caused me. The whip pierced my eyesocket momentarily blinding me. But the blood pooling from my face is not merely for her cuss words. They whipped me for everyone who cried Hosanna then crucify Him as if the first word was not heard.
Forgive them Father. It is the only thing to do. They do not understand that this act is about denying you. Father I ask you to consider all of them at once. The liar, the thief, the prostitute, the selfish who are consumed with their own wants. Father, please Forgive them. The pain it hurts me so, but I can't believe they would've hung me if in their hearts they'd known. I sat with you in heaven. I loved them before they were born. I was delighted when they sought you and in their sin I mourned. I didn't want to leave you. Father, you know my words are true. But the love we felt for these Your people was bigger than Me sitting beside You. Father how could they know truly how much they are loved? You sent Me, Your only Son, from heaven to hang here. They couldn't know. Inside my organs are failing, dying one by one. For the cheater my kidney.... for the addict my lungs... The pain is agonizing. Oh heavenly Father the pain.... I can't hold on much longer. Father, can you hear me? Are you there? Have You left me all alone? Daddy! Daddy! Father....please welcome Me back home.
Friday, February 8, 2013
What Is Your Objective?
What Is Your Objective?
Take a moment and ask yourself, what is my objective? Why am I up on this phone at 5 in the morning? Why do I call in for the ministry calls on Sunday & Wednesday nights? Am I calling in because I want to serve or am I calling in to be served? Is my work with this ministry, or another ministry, or my job unto man or unto God? The bible says in
Colossians 3:23-24 KJV
And whatsoever ye do, do it heartily, as to the Lord, and not unto men; Knowing that of the Lord ye shall receive the reward of the inheritance: for ye serve the Lord Christ.
So again I say ask yourself, what is my objective? Am I growing in the knowledge of Christ for myself or do I hunger after the word so that I might serve it to the masses? When I sit at the table is it after I have been of service or is it only to be in position to fill my plate? The question again is what is your objective? The bible says in
Matthew 20:26-28 NIV
Not so with you. Instead, whoever wants to become great among you must be your servant, and whoever wants to be first must be your slave— just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.”
If Jesus, Almighty God in the flesh, came to serve, should service not be the objective of all who call on Him? Should service not be the objective of all who profess His name? Should service not be the objective of every man, woman, boy, and girl who says "I am a Christian"? For, to be a Christian is to be Christ like. Jesus's life is the blueprint of what it means to serve. So, what is your objective?
I hope you ate well.
C. Brooks for Sunday Morning Breakfast~2/7/13
Thursday, February 7, 2013
Monday, February 4, 2013
Today Is The Big Day!!!!!
Friday, November 30, 2012
The Master Builder
"Who is the master builder?"
I've sat with what I might say about being under construction for a few weeks now. The popular saying "God is not through with me yet" has toyed with my mind on and off for the duration of this time. "God is not through with me...I have to get my anger under control. God is not through with me....I need to stop cursing. God is not through with me...I have to stop drinking. God is not through with me....I have to find a way to leave this married man alone." Everyone one of these statements sounds like a good plan. I need to stop being angry. I need to stop cursing. I need to stop drinking. I need to leave this married man alone. But I have to challenge these statements with a question. Who's the master builder is it me or is it God?
Who is the master builder? The bible says in Psalm 127, Except the Lord build the house, they labour in vain that build it.... Hmmm... Except the Lord build the house... Does that mean that I am not the one who needs to do this? Am I not the one to control my temper, my mouth, my thirst, my lust? Except the Lord build a house...... So these habits I've developed of apologizing when I'm not sorry, thinking the curse word instead of verbalizing it, drinking wine coolers instead of vodka, sleeping with my boyfriend instead of my married man....you mean to tell me changing my habits doesn't end this?
I thought that if I said "God forgive me I'm working on it", I would be ok. I thought if I said "Lord you know that this sounds good, tastes good, feels good, Is good", that I wouldn't have to worry. I acknowledged God didn't I? I gave Him His props. So what I didn't allow Him to change my heart and word my mouth. So what I didn't allow Him to quench my thirst. So what I didn't allow Him to be my lover. I acknowledged Him. Doesn't the bible say in all thy ways acknowledge Him? I know that I heard that somewhere. What is the problem exactly? I knew these things were wrong so I fixed them. I took control. I got it together. I'm living a better life. People tell me so all the time. Where's my bible? Here it is.... Let me see, where's that verse? It has to be here somewhere.... Got it. Proverbs 3:6.... Oh no, that's not what I've been doing.
In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.
So God is the master builder? Wow! I missed that.
I hope you ate well today.
C. Brooks for Sunday Morning Breakfast 11/30/2012
Sunday, October 28, 2012
Faith in the Midst of a Dead Situation
While reading my bible, this was revealed to me.
Why haven't you exercised your faith? Why have you allowed the state of your situation to dictate what you believe?
In 2 Kings 4, there is a story of a Shunammite woman. She shows kindness to the prophet Elisha. He subsequently entreats the Lord on her behalf and she and her husband are blessed with a son. Some time later, the son falls ill and dies in the woman's arms. She springs into action seeking help from the man of God WITHOUT so much as telling her husband of her son's death. She acted in faith and did not activate her doubts by speaking life to the dead situation. She could have told her husband "our child is dead". She could have sent for the wailers, gathered her family and friends, and immersed herself in the business of mourning. Her actions shed light on a few things.
1. She remembered the first word. She did not let what happened replace what God told her.
2. She gave no place to the negative. The bible does not record that she shed one tear. Everything that she did was about restoring that which she had lost.
3. She walked by faith. Her faith in God said this is not a dead situation though it may look that way.
4. She held her tongue. Her child died, but she believed the word of the Lord so much that she did not speak death into the atmosphere. The bible says that both death and life are in the power of the tongue.
5. She moved. She didn't keep watch over the dead. The bible also says that faith without works is dead. What lesson would there be if she had remained where she was?
I've read this story many times before, but today it was personal. Today it was a mirror for me. The Shunammite woman had a dead child, but so many of us have dead dreams, relationships, finances, jobs, faith. It's time that we stop mourning the loss and start activating our faith. Remember the first word. Steer clear of wallowing in your feelings. Close your eyes to what it looks like and see what God said it would be. Stop running your mouth about what went wrong, looks wrong, is wrong, etc. Every negative word you speak, builds the fire. And finally, relocate be that physically or figuratively. Nothing will be gained by keeping house with the dead.
Saturday, March 14, 2009
Notes from Round Up 2008 (12/19/08)
A few things that must happen if you are to stand in the gap.
1. Produce the fruit of the righteousness of God.
2. You must lay some things aside. You can't have one foot in the world and one in the church. You have to leave some things at the door.
3. Receive the word. God will fill whatever you empty. He can only fill those things that are yielded to Him. Receive with meekness.
4. You must be doers of the word. Let God change your heart.
1. Produce the fruit of the righteousness of God.
2. You must lay some things aside. You can't have one foot in the world and one in the church. You have to leave some things at the door.
3. Receive the word. God will fill whatever you empty. He can only fill those things that are yielded to Him. Receive with meekness.
4. You must be doers of the word. Let God change your heart.
Friday, March 6, 2009
When Faced With A Difficult Decision
When faced with a difficult decision the first thing you should do is run away to the Bahamas! I had a great time this week. It was in so many ways just what the doctor ordered. I was able to eat massive amounts of food, sleep in the sun, and meet a bunch of crazy people. The fact that I had a friend with me was a bonus. We hung out, but not in the cling on way that it would have been if we were a couple. He was there for me, but he was totally free to roam and do whatever....and he did, but that's his business so I won't tell it.
Anyway, the day before my trip was really heart wrenching and emotionally draining. I woke up knowing that something was up. It happens like that with me quite a bit. I pay close attention if it happens on a church day. Typically it means that God has something just for me. This past Sunday was one of those days. I arrived at church and made the mistake of sitting too close to gossip row. It was an honest mistake. I really just wanted to be close to Jessica. She and I were less than 24 hours from celebrating our birthdays and hey I love Jessica so that is reason enough. The problem is my teacher ears were on fine tune and I heard every word of certain people's conversations. It annoyed me to know end and before I knew it I was thinking I should have just stayed home because soon I will not be here anyway. I had a little pain in my heart with that thought, but they were on my last nerve.
It all began to take shape for me when my pastor had his son and daughter sing this song. It's an old song by James Cleveland called "I Walk With God". They did an awesome job of singing the devil right out of my spirit. The song touched me in a way that doesn't happen all the time. I had goosebumps and it was like God was preparing me. Had I known that I would hear a word that would lead to me calling first the assistant pastor and then the pastor in a fit of tears, I might have gotten up and left right then. Not because the outcome was unfavorable, but because I was overwhelmed with grief.
Every word in the sermon that followed the song, struck something inside of me. I was angry when it was over because I knew then that I was faced with a difficult decision. I knew that Atlanta was not the move I was supposed to be making. I knew, but I was in an absolute panic and all of the things that I'd held in since I decided to go came rushing to the forefront. When it was over, I had said some really mean things to my sister and been comforted by the truth from a friend. Luckily for me my sister knows that I go into all out rebel mode when I don't really want to accept something and she loves me so all was forgiven. But there was still the matter of Atlanta.
The whole time I was on my trip I kept hearing Tsadok singing "for the key to my success is that I walk with God". All week I heard that. I heard it during breakfast. I heard it while I was walking along the deck admiring beauty of the ocean. I heard it as I walked along the streets in Nassau. I even heard it in my sleep. I have not been able to escape it. It is only now that I am realizing the difficulty in staying isn't about the fact that I sold or gave away EVERYTHING. It's not about the fact that all of my clothes and mementos are safely at my uncle's house awaiting my return. The difficulty is accepting that I'm not in control. I made a decision, but I was never in control. Walking with God isn't about me taking the lead. It's about being willing to follow Him through whatever the journey is.
I had to sell my stuff. I had to do all of it to get to this point. I have no idea what happens next. I don't know where I'm going to live and I still don't have a job. What I do have is a leader who I am willing to follow.
Anyway, the day before my trip was really heart wrenching and emotionally draining. I woke up knowing that something was up. It happens like that with me quite a bit. I pay close attention if it happens on a church day. Typically it means that God has something just for me. This past Sunday was one of those days. I arrived at church and made the mistake of sitting too close to gossip row. It was an honest mistake. I really just wanted to be close to Jessica. She and I were less than 24 hours from celebrating our birthdays and hey I love Jessica so that is reason enough. The problem is my teacher ears were on fine tune and I heard every word of certain people's conversations. It annoyed me to know end and before I knew it I was thinking I should have just stayed home because soon I will not be here anyway. I had a little pain in my heart with that thought, but they were on my last nerve.
It all began to take shape for me when my pastor had his son and daughter sing this song. It's an old song by James Cleveland called "I Walk With God". They did an awesome job of singing the devil right out of my spirit. The song touched me in a way that doesn't happen all the time. I had goosebumps and it was like God was preparing me. Had I known that I would hear a word that would lead to me calling first the assistant pastor and then the pastor in a fit of tears, I might have gotten up and left right then. Not because the outcome was unfavorable, but because I was overwhelmed with grief.
Every word in the sermon that followed the song, struck something inside of me. I was angry when it was over because I knew then that I was faced with a difficult decision. I knew that Atlanta was not the move I was supposed to be making. I knew, but I was in an absolute panic and all of the things that I'd held in since I decided to go came rushing to the forefront. When it was over, I had said some really mean things to my sister and been comforted by the truth from a friend. Luckily for me my sister knows that I go into all out rebel mode when I don't really want to accept something and she loves me so all was forgiven. But there was still the matter of Atlanta.
The whole time I was on my trip I kept hearing Tsadok singing "for the key to my success is that I walk with God". All week I heard that. I heard it during breakfast. I heard it while I was walking along the deck admiring beauty of the ocean. I heard it as I walked along the streets in Nassau. I even heard it in my sleep. I have not been able to escape it. It is only now that I am realizing the difficulty in staying isn't about the fact that I sold or gave away EVERYTHING. It's not about the fact that all of my clothes and mementos are safely at my uncle's house awaiting my return. The difficulty is accepting that I'm not in control. I made a decision, but I was never in control. Walking with God isn't about me taking the lead. It's about being willing to follow Him through whatever the journey is.
I had to sell my stuff. I had to do all of it to get to this point. I have no idea what happens next. I don't know where I'm going to live and I still don't have a job. What I do have is a leader who I am willing to follow.
Saturday, November 1, 2008
Any Given Sunday
It seems that I am on some kind of once a week rotation with this now. Today was a regular roller coaster. I was happy and then my team lost and I was sad. I started watching 90210 reruns and I was revived. I realized I only have 3 left out of 94 and devastation set in. What is the use of free episodes if they are only going to give me a third of the series?
Tomorrow is a big day for me. Three years ago my sister invited me to Family and Friends day at her church. I thought, what the hell I'll go. I'd been so unhappy for a long time. I was searching for something then. I wanted to get married, but it didn't feel right. I wanted a sense of belonging, but no matter where I turned I just kept feeling empty and unsatisfied. I went to Family and Friends day expecting nothing. Well, that's not exactly true. I expected to be there all day. I'd visited my sister's church as a kid. The only thing I remembered was falling asleep, waking up, and wondering why on earth we were still there.
When I got to church that day, I was so happy that my sister invited me. I was so happy to stand up and announce that I was her guest. I was so happy because I knew then that I'd found a large part of what I was looking for. I found the place where God wanted to reconnect with me.
I was smiling again. I was happy, hopeful, and optimistic. I was looking forward to my life again. So many things have happened since that day. I can't explain how profoundly my life has changed. My outlook is different. My expectations have changed. I think about where I would be if I'd said no or if she hadn't asked. I am certain that God would have found another way to guide me home. Nevertheless, I thank Him for giving me a sister who thought enough to ask.
Tomorrow is a big day for me. Three years ago my sister invited me to Family and Friends day at her church. I thought, what the hell I'll go. I'd been so unhappy for a long time. I was searching for something then. I wanted to get married, but it didn't feel right. I wanted a sense of belonging, but no matter where I turned I just kept feeling empty and unsatisfied. I went to Family and Friends day expecting nothing. Well, that's not exactly true. I expected to be there all day. I'd visited my sister's church as a kid. The only thing I remembered was falling asleep, waking up, and wondering why on earth we were still there.
When I got to church that day, I was so happy that my sister invited me. I was so happy to stand up and announce that I was her guest. I was so happy because I knew then that I'd found a large part of what I was looking for. I found the place where God wanted to reconnect with me.
I was smiling again. I was happy, hopeful, and optimistic. I was looking forward to my life again. So many things have happened since that day. I can't explain how profoundly my life has changed. My outlook is different. My expectations have changed. I think about where I would be if I'd said no or if she hadn't asked. I am certain that God would have found another way to guide me home. Nevertheless, I thank Him for giving me a sister who thought enough to ask.
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