Today was the worst day EVER. Now that I've gotten that out of the way. I don't want to talk about it because those who answered, know. Those who didn't, won't.
What I learned from today was there is great value in accepting an apology. There is great value in listening to the other side of the story. I decided 3 years ago that I didn't like the way my life was. I didn't like the pointlessness. I wanted a change and so much has changed, but then today I learned that I still have a hard time making peace when I am wounded. On the inside I felt like I have to be on the defensive. I have to make sure they know I am not going to back down. But before I could say a word out came an apology. It didn't change the scope of the worst day ever, but it made me remember that it's easier to forgive than resent and really that whole thing was not why I was mad anyway. I was dealing with trying to piece together what has been falling apart and I almost let a misunderstanding turn into something it didn't need to be......
I don't really like what I just wrote at all, but I'll let it stand because it was on my mind. I'll end with a poem that I just shared with my gf. It makes me laugh a little because it came from such a good place. After the day I've had I can use a happy ending.
Deep inside I thought our time mattered
Deep inside I thought our days spent
laying around
listening to the beginning of us
would impact you differently
Deep inside I thought
the hands held
secrets told
embraces shared
would change things....expand us
I thought you meant it when you told me
you wanted me
Didn't know it would all end with you
Deep inside
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