So many things are running through my mind right now. I want to be asleep, but I close my eyes and I see all of us sitting under the tree. I see us walking down the railroad tracks. Going back and forth to the julip lady's house for snacks. In my mind I'm remembering the 5th Sunday congress and Boardwalk & Baseball. The trips we took to Lithia Springs are rolling through like a movie reel. Sometimes we were at our house. Sometimes we were sitting in chairs on the side of Monica's house. Wherever we were, we were all together. There was so much love then. So much love and so many memories. Playing Pac Man at the laundromat. Getting cookies from Ms. Luvinia's store. Walking to Bradenton for the parade. Buying matching outfits for the fair. I remember so many things. I wonder why these thoughts are in my mind.
I am remembering my first boyfriend....the simplicity of our first kiss. These things were all in a time where a teenage love wasn't all that complicated. You held hands. You kissed. You made plans. But mostly, you waited for something to happen. You waited to be an adult. You waited and while you were waiting you forgot to savor the moments. You assumed that growing up would be better and you would all always be together. Now, it is not so. The place you all shared and loved is only a fraction of what it once was. Houses line the field near the railroad tracks. Grandma's house is long gone. We are all scattered about living these lives that we waited for. All I want is to go to sleep, but somehow all I can do is remember and wonder why we thought that this would be so much better than it was.
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