I'm Not Sad at All

I'm writing right now out of necessity instead of desire. It's only 9AM and the glow of another peaceful night's sleep is starting to fade. I have already spent two hours searching the internet. I have already started the process of what may turn out to be my next endeavor. I have already done so much today, but it feels like I haven't done anything. It feels like I haven't even awaken from my sleep. It feels like my day so far is a part of some dream I keep having.

I keep wondering when I will feel sadness over the loss of my job. I'm not wondering because I want to feel sad. I wondering because people keep asking me why I'm not. I haven't shed a tear or felt down. I haven't done anything except been at peace. Somehow that doesn't seem to be enough. The question I keep getting is will you go home? I am puzzled because I am home. I live in Tallahassee. I didn't move here for Lincoln. I moved here for God. God still has work for me to do right here. God put Tallahassee in my heart when all I wanted was my mama, my family/friends, and Westcoast.

I was speaking to one of my sisters about how God keeps giving me the things I always wanted. I always wanted to work at an A school. I can say that I've done that. I always wanted to work for Atlanta Public Schools. I was offered that. I believe that God is on the verge on granting some of my other desires. Only this time, I think He is working on the ones that are in my heart way down on the inside. I am so hopeful and so optimistic about what is to come. So I say to all of you, please don't feel sad for me. My future is in God's hands and that is all right with me.